some thoughts about life

Why to be pessimistic:

First, the reality. (or what fortune cookies should really say) Absolutey ZERO of these are good reasons to take your own life, these are just medium to minor setbacks that can and will occur)

No, the cup is not half full, the check won't be in the mail forever, the CRT monitor is not as big as they say it is, the Hi-Fi amplifier is not as powerful as the specs say,  it really is not a good night to come over, the dog is just a puppy(and therefore he is upgraded to deity status by the person who sicked him on you), UPDATE: I finally got a Peltier cooling chip, the old ways of pagan sorcery do not work, America will always be a nation of Atheists that breed like rabbits, in any country copyrights will be immortal, you will find someone who will drive with the window shade in place, I'm not your chauffer, I'm not here to entertain you, you're going to have to change that bulb in the stairwell soon, there is rarely enough time for play, there is often never enough tape remaining in the cassette for that important recording, the Keno number that's been coming up like crazy will stop on the first game that you buy a ticket for it,

Now the fantasy.

Optimists believe that everything will work out right, and magically (as in a certain false religion) never tell you/or pretend not to experience the downfalls when things don't work out right. They believe that you should look on the bright side, and let the problems roll off your back (yeah, let's IGNORE them!! That'll work!{sarcasm}) Optimists tend to not complain when things don't go their way, and say "Oh well, that's life/those are the breaks/that's how the cookie crumbles" instead of being the squeaky wheel and getting the grease. In other words, they believe that things will magically and sorcerily get better and then feel devestated when it doesn't, and then "cover up" these feelings so that it looks OK. It's like a witch who casts spells and says words, and when it doesn't work, she makes it look to everyone else like it did.

Why to be Optimistic:

Before you say I'm feeling sorry for myself, look at the numbered list below. I don't have it that bad. Or, why I continue to live. (The following statements are true!)

1. I have a strange Christian (Supernatural? What do you call a non sorcery/non-new-age power?) ability to ALWAYS get what I want, so long as I don't use this for evil. I believe in God because this ability has never failed, not even once (once you exclude the non-righteous wants like getting revenge toward someone I hate) 2. Large problems automatically solve themselves (remember December 2000) 3. My parents are still together, have never abused me, and don't get in trouble with the law. 4. I have free rent/no bills to pay. 5. I am willing to work for my food. 6. I have plenty of money, though this can't go on forever. 7. I have many friends. 8. I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want. 9. I can go to bed at any hour. 10. I own practically every material thing I ever wished for. 11. I don't have to go to work or school. 13. I have free time. 14. I don't need drugs (except the prescribed kind),crime,shoplifting, alcohol, sex, or romance to make me happy. 15. My genes aren't from the Ford Motor Company (I have all four limbs, all senses except smell, can walk, not allergic to any known substance that doesn't make a normal person allergic, I heal fast, have no cancerous growths,) 16. Because I believe in God, bad things are less likely to happen to me. I feel safe when I walk down the street. 17. I'm still alive for another day of the Life of Riley, and I know, that if I don't kill myself, I will die and get an even better life after that.

Things that will never change in this realm.

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