The worst phonograph ever!
Here is the story of the worst Middle Earth sound recording apparatus to ever see the light of day, the Sword-corder One. No one knows how many cuts elves, dwarves and men have gotten from this diabolical invention. It consists of a sword, a paper cup and a sewing needle. As you medieval buffs may already know, a sword has a depression running down the center of both sides of the blade in order to save material. And as a scientist knows, sound waves can be recorded on metal acoustically. Now, by dragging a paper cup with a needle pointing out the bottom down the sword's depression, sound can be recorded. It can also be played back with the same cup/needle combination.
Doesn't the circular thing on the hilt look like a sound box or reproducer?
1. Blanks to record on are easy to find.

2. You can scratch with it.

3. You can demonstrate acoustic recording to a war-torn area.

4. It's cheap.
1. You can get cut using it.

2. The sound quality will even make mortal men cringe!

3. The longest recording is eleven seconds long.

4. There is the danger that less smarter people will run someone through in order to play back the recording.

5. There is no spring so you can't play back recordings unattended.

6. There is no governor, so the speed can be messed up.

7. It's violent!
Sound quality sample: This file is a sample of the sound quality you can expect to get when recording on a sword.
It says "eleven seconds of recording"
Back to Sound reproduction formats of Middle Earth.